They tend to think of it as a escapade -one that can be fun, but with a healthy potency for disaster.But according to relationship counsellors, most don’t take the first step because of the fear of the unknown, or rejection. These loners have a tendency to believe in the age-old myths that keep them single and always looking. Knowing these myths will help you reel the right fish successfully. Check out what keep you from finding love…
It’s always love at first sight
So when you know, you know? Actually, no. Most of the times, we are quick to judge, and dismiss those who don’t share similar interests.We’ll make up our minds about someone even before we properly get to know them; forget giving them a chance.
But remember, being quick to judge ensures that no one will ever measure up. This will keep you in a constant state of despair. Come on, be practical. It takes time to get to know someone -especially if they are super quiet -so let them be and let things happen for you. Sit back, relax, and enjoy the experience before you decide how you feel.Patience is a virtue, and more often than not, it’s rewarding.
Put your intuition to sleep
While keeping an open mind is key, it is also important to listen to your hunch. Our inner voice, or what we know as intuition, can give us information that our rational minds may not understand. This means you may find yourself on a date with someone who you didn’t think was your type, but you find yourself attracted to Listen.
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Likewise, you may be on a date with someone who you thought is a right mark on all your check boxes, but when you are with himher, you don’t quite think it is right. In that case, listen to yourself again. Your intuition may not seem logical at the time, but chances are, your inner light is guiding you in the right direction.
You have to first date online
Don’t be influenced by what your friends say -or friends of friends, for that matter. If online dating makes you cringe, don’t go down that route. The path of finding true love is meant to be fun and exciting; it’s not supposed to feel like an obligation, or a chore.
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People are everywhere, so are potential partners -at your workplace, yoga class, club, or at the promenade walking their dog -so keep your heart open.Each time you leave your house, tell yourself, `wonder whom I’ll meet today’.This sets you on the right path for connections in a var ety of places. The Universe is always listening to your thoughts, so put the signal out there.
Treat dating like a business
Rule number one, dating should not feel like a grind. It should make you feel happy and allow you to go with the flow, and be yourself. We meet the right people when we feel great inside. Make sure you are having fun in the process of dating, and you’ll be on the right track. If you focus all your energies on the give and take, demand and supply, then you are better off trading at the markets, not with people.
It’s about getting to know another person
Yes, dating is about getting to know other people, but it is also about getting to know yourself better.
We’re putting ourselves out there, trying to make an impres sion, hoping to a be liked. When fears come up, ask yourself: What do I fear so much? What insecurities am I feeling? How can I try to be truer to myself? Rather than letting these challenges drag you down, let them be opportunities for you to stretch and grow into a new level of confidence.
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When relationships end, we feel bad.In this case, dating someone else could be a defence against difficult feelings. This is when you should avoid a rebound, because you’re attracting someone else as a distraction.This is not fair to you or your partner.Only when you are over somebody, will you feel both good and relieved.This is a great place to be in and the right space to attract someone new.Make sure you have healed from your previous heartbreak and have regained enough confidence and strength before you put yourself out there. When you take time to heal, you’ll be fully ready for a new relationship when the time is right.
Dating is a number game
Life lesson to learn, note to self, or whatever else you’d like to #hashtag, and reaffirm: Never compromise quality over quantity. If you’re filling up your schedule with dates, it scatters your energies and people sense it. We humans are always exchanging energies -even if it means sitting across the table with somebody sharing a cup of coffee. This mentality does not help you make genuine connections or find someone you love. Make every person you choose to go out feel important.This will increase your likelihood of being present on a date, and give you an opportunity to make a lasting connection.
Mr Right will complete you
Most of the people seek a relationship from the space of `I’m looking for someone to complete me’.Approaching a relationship from the stance of `what am I going to get?’ is always a bad idea. Spend some time alone and find fulfilment within yourself first. When you’re fulfilled in your own life, a fantastic relationship will be an amazing bonus. This is the secret to being fulfilled by love. Focus on having a good time, stay open to the possibilities, and be secure in the knowledge -your match is looking for you, just the way you are.