Future Proof Your Marriage
Conflicts arise even in the happiest of marriages. However, even with conflicts you can future proof your marriage. Future proofing your marriage happens simply, when both of you learns to use just two words frequently. These magic two words are “thank you”.
These simple yet magical and extremely meaningful words, thank you, will weather any conflict. Even the most negative conflict patterns will not lead to a defining impact on a couple’s relationship if the couple show their gratitude for one another regularly. Take note of the word “regularly”.
The couple must learn to use these two words frequently and regularly. These two words should be used as “prevention” to conflicts and not an immediate remedy or solution to conflicts. Meaning if you don’t express your gratitude and appreciation in every occasion possible, it will not work to solve a possible conflict in the future. It is like the saying, “An apple a day, keeps the doctor away.” Saying “thank you” frequently and regularly will cushion any conflict in a couple’s relationship.
The feeling that you are appreciated and that you are valuable to your spouse directly influences how you feel about your marriage. It affects your commitment to your marriage and your belief that your marriage will last. The words “thank you” are positive reinforcements to your desire to keep your relationship going despite any issues.
A study revealed that spouses who feel appreciated by one another are far less likely to entertain the thought of divorce. The underlying love in gracious statements fuels commitment. Essentially, the words ‘thank you’ are like a shield. These two simple words work as a form of protection against relationship conflicts.
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These two simple words are very much important especially to couples who are not adept communicators in conflict. Good communication is one of the most important means or ways to keep a relationship happy. But when good communication does not happen because one or both parties are not good communicators, then the habit of saying “thank you” will help them strengthen their marriage.
Financial distress has been identified as the leading causes of unhealthy and failed marriages. When couples have the money issue, they are more likely to engage in negative feelings toward each other. They start being critical of each other and being defensive. They would blame each other of over spending and spending unnecessarily. This will lead them to withdraw from each other and refuse to talk about this issue for the fear of being labeled greedy, unreasonable, etc. This then leads to lower marital quality.
When stress such as this takes hold of us, gratitude will prevail if it is put into practice regularly and frequently. The thought that your spouse appreciates and values you will erase doubts on your mind. It will calm you down and take away all negative thoughts.
All couples have disagreements, so not having any disagreement cannot be used as a basis for a good marriage because not having disagreements is impossible. What distinguishes the marriages that last from failed marriages is not how often the couple has disagreements or how often they argue, but how they argue and how they treat each other on a daily basis.
Saying thank you frequently and regularly with feeling will future proof your marriage.